The young kids amongst us may not remember the “Gong Show” from the 1970s but our three ought to as it was a fifth grade tradition at the end of the year at Washington Elementary.
The premise is simplicity itself…someone does their schtick on the stage and is desperately hoping to survive the ringing of a massive gong by the judges indicating your act is over because it sucks rocks.
We’ve already touched upon Mistletoe’s cleverness…she has picked up many tricks already in the past five weeks much faster than one might imagine she would.
One of these is for her to go to the front door and ring the string of bells that is attached to the handle when she’s ready to survey her realm of pee and poo and contribute more to it! She goes to the door, rings the bell, sits for her leash to be attached and then she’s off. And she’s gotten really good at that…so much so that accidents have been few and far between (knock on the fake wood of the floor near that door!).
Now enter Katie who gives this kind-of spoken beatnik poet rendition of MC Hammer’s “U Can’t Touch This” that is possibly the most discordant one I had ever heard. She said her goal at the time was to find sounds that would freak out Mistletoe and I’d say she succeeded beyond her wildest imagination.
So much so, that Mistletoe decided that she had had enough and took a page out of MC Hammer’s playbook and put one of his lyrics from that song to good use:
Yo, sound the bell, school’s in, sucker!
“U Can’t Touch This”, MC Hammer from “Please Hammer Don’t Hurt ‘Em”
It did not matter that she didn’t need to go as she had been out to her potty just a couple of minutes prior to Katie just asking for me to go all Simon Cowell on her performance.
When the bell rings, you run and get that puppy out that front door. That’s how it works. And it does wonders for shutting down ill-advised rap performances by someone eminently unqualified to perform rap.
Right clever puppy, she is! 🙂
Mind you, Mistletoe does seem to have a soft spot after gonging Katie out the door. After the potty trip, Katie continued her search for sounds to annoy dogs (and everyone round her!).
Probably the most effective was her feeding the lyrics of that MC Hammer song to Google Translate. Yes, it was even more awful than Katie’s version…hard as it is to believe that was even possible!
Then she topped it with feeding “What Does the Fox Say?” to Siri.
Shoot me now. Please. 🙂
