Today Alex needed some laboratory tests run so we had a slight detour from the “go to the back of Enloe and collect Katie and Alex” thing we usually do after school.
The closest facility in Duke’s network is at the old Raleigh Community Hospital campus which was not a pleasant visit the last time we tried to have labs drawn there. It didn’t seem to matter to the person behind the desk that we were specifically instructed to visit that lab facility as opposed to driving all the way to Durham for something simple like this.
It didn’t help they had a policy specifically excluding patients under 18 years old on the door which is what they used as justification to boot us out the door the last time.
But considering the alternative was driving out to Brier Creek or Durham, I figured I’d give it a shot.
The parking deck wasn’t particularly encouraging…not much space to move about with a SUV and it took three laps to finally find a space next to someone explicitly violating the “no tobacco campus” policy. Bleeeechhhhh! 🙁
But after a cursory “health examination” which involved only hand sanitizer and a bit of hurry-up-and-wait at the clinic, the same receptionist from last time didn’t bat an eye at his age even though the same policy is still on the door.
Even more shocking was actually getting through the door with the lab technician who turned out to be really awesome milking poor Alex for about as much blood as you can imagine to fill at least nine vials. Seriously, the tray he was wielding was so full of separate test sample vials you couldn’t see the bottom of the accessories tray!
But he got the vein on the first shot with minimal pain for Alex and we’re thinking we’re home free.
That’s when the sample container he’d been hiding came out to play.
To borrow Dr Sam Beckett’s phrase from “Quantum Leap”…”oh boy!”
And of course, they don’t have one of these special jugs that would make life *SO* much easier…
Instead, they have a flimsy “toilet hat” and I’m having visions of wishing they’d issue me a MOPP-IV full body chemical suit before proceeding. 🙁
Next time she has me take him for a blood draw, I’m making sure the handle urinal we kept from a previous hospital visit comes along for the ride!
Long story short, we accomplish the mission of collecting the sample with the only casualties of the piddle being the toilet seat and our lab tech is pleased at the quantity at which point we’re free to go.
That was surprisingly painless! 🙂
Now it’s time to figure out where I’m going…back to my house or direct to Clayton after reporting “mission accomplished” and a bit of a confession appears in the text…
Now, I’m inclined to accept that the unexpected sample collection was a sincere oversight.
Truth be told, I didn’t think of bringing the handle urinal either so that would seem to be a fair cop, eh?
However, the last text in the series does introduce a slight amount of doubt…
She wouldn’t do me wrong…would she? 😉
